Shopping!

Ok, since Stacy said I "looked cute" in her comment (Angi looking half way stylish is not the norm so please see her comment on the last post to confirm) I have to tell you about a new place I found to shop! Maybe it's not new to you guys (if so, then why hasn't anyone told me about it?) but I love PAPAYA! It has really cute clothes that are super cheap! T-shirts are 4 or 5 dollars and jackets are 20 to 30 dollars! The store is arranged with like colors together which makes for easy shopping even if you're not a shopper! AND if you find a style of shirt you like you can get one in every color! Is that something only I do? Best of all the one in the Galleria is right next to the play area which is great bribing material! So I don't sound like a commercial, I will say the t-shirts fit a little tight (just go a size up) and some of the clothes may be a little more teenage than mom style (what is mom style anyways?). Give it a try and call me so I can go too!

Satisfy My Desires

It’s been awhile! I have so many things to say and not enough time to write them all. When I have time I am going to do a quick update on Mason and his “favorite year yet!”. He is so cute and is really blooming this year. I really wanted to journal what happened last night just as a reminder to myself…


Yesterday was just a really challenging day. Several things happened, but I really can’t blame the way I felt on anything around me . The only way I can describe it was that my mind was under attack. The day seemed so long and so taxing. I tried my best to get myself out of it, praying and returning to scriptures, but nothing seemed to work. By the time the day was over I was really beaten down and feeling very hopeless. Then something happened... God gave me a great gift, it wasn’t something I could hold in my hand or even something that was really visible. It was more of a renewing, suddenly the darkness lifted and I could think clearly again. It was so beautiful and I knew in my soul it was from God. I felt like He was showing me, I’m here even when it doesn’t feel like it, even when your mind cannot understand me or what I’m doing, I’m here. It seemed almost like a lesson that next time my mind goes to that dark place, even when it lasts longer than a day, maybe I can rest on the fact that at the end is something really beautiful. Something He has just for me. I love this verse, (Is 58:11) the whole chapter actually.

“And the LORD will guide you continually and satisfy your desire in scorched places and make your bones strong; and you shall be like a watered garden, like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.”

I used to think it was just for missionaries and the like, but I decided to keep it for my own. It’s pretty hot, where I am…

Psalms 27: Functional Blindness

"...to gaze upon the beauty of the Lord and seek him in his holy temple." (v.4b)

I would like to think
that others are blind,
but I am not.
I would like to think
that I have
clarity of vision,
a penetrating insight
that lights my way.
I am good at recognizing
the sight problems of others.
I am skilled
at pointing out
the gaps in their vision
and the blind spots
that alter how they see
and the way they
respond.
I would like to
believe
that I have 20/20 vision,
but the evidence points
to the sad fact thatI don't.
I have the stunning ability
to look around
and not see You.
I see my
busy schedule
tasks to complete
problems to solve
people to see
demands to be met
things to repair
pressures to face
temptations to fight
pleasures to consume
things to build
things to tear down
plans to make
difficulties to survive
huge responsibilities
and short days.
I gaze at my life
every day
and again and again I fail
to see You.
It is a scary reality,
humbling to admit.
Though this world
is filled with
Your glory,
I exist
so much of the time
glory blind.
In Your love
You created a world
that is a sight and sound
display
of Your magnificent glory.
No matter from what perspective
we're looking,
no matter what vista
we're taking in,
no matter where we're standing
and which way
we're gazing,
Your glory is visible
and evident.
Yet, again and again
I fail to seeYour beauty.
So I seek Your
healing
one more time.
Please place Your
powerful hands
on my broken eyes
and give me sight again.
Please place your
powerful hands
on my wayward heart
and make it seek again.
Don't let me be
so blinded
with me and mine,
that I fail to seeYou.
For it's only
when my eyes
see Your beauty,
and my heart is filled with Your
glory
that I'll quit seeking
identity
meaning
satisfaction
purpose
fulfillment
and life,
where it can't be found.
So I would pray
this simple prayer,
"Please touch me by
Your grace
so that there'll never
be a day
where I haven't
somehow
someway
gazed upon
Your beauty."

-Paul Tripp

More on the new house and my heart

We are in our house. What a blessing, we love the neighborhood, the area, the school, and of course the house. We are doing some renovations and it has prevented us from unpacking the majority of the house, so we’ve been living in a disaster area for the last 2 weeks. My one year old is determined (and I do mean determined) to get electrocuted by the exposed outlets, swallow the loose screws, climb into the fireplace, pull down all the paper over the windows… And we are all tired of living out of boxes, at the mall, eating out… This is my confession, it is so easy for me to stand in the middle of the house look around and start to panic. I see all the mess, I feel all the aches of moving, I have all the worries of being unsettled and THEN here it comes, instead of praying and begging to see what God has for me I start pointing and looking around. I say “ there are people all across the world that would LOVE to be in my shoes, what gives me the right to complain?” Unfortunately this is not a prayer that comes from a heart full of mercy, instead mine is full of pride. Much like the prayer of the Pharisee in Luke 18:9. My heart is full of religion one that abides by moral law and not by grace. Basically, I’m saying don’t help me God, I need to do this myself, help those that are really sick, really weak, not me I’m too good and strong for your help. I love how Rose Miller explains religious moralism in her book, From Fear to Freedom…

Religious moralism is rooted in the power of will and self. Eventually it fails and we act like orphans: frightened, insecure people who need to be in control. We might be able to analyze of problems, but we cannot invent a cure. (and so we are left with our heads spinning, lost in the problem totally unable to see Hope)

Ok, this writing thing really helps me, I’m getting so excited. You what this means!? It’s all a facade! That’s right you know order, control, it’s not true, even though sometimes it seems like maybe I have some I really don’t. But I have Jesus (or He has me) and where I just analyze (can I even do that?) , He will CHANGE (my heart or whatever He sees fit)! Forget the house change my heart! Ok, my balloon has been popped… The room has stopped spinning and I’m realizing once again that He died for Me, ornery self righteous me. Today has suddenly turned into a beautiful day, wow…

House #2

If first you don't succeed, try try again! The first house was beautiful, but at the inspection we found out that it was falling apart. It needed big things like a new roof, work on the A/C, work on the pool and the list goes on. We have decided on a house in the same general area, this one needs a little cosmetic work, but that is a lot more fun than a new roof! Move in date is August 13th...

Big Update!

Where should I begin!? This blog hasn’t been updated in so long! Back in June we sold our house! Yeah! I actually met the new owners and they seem like great people. I talked to the wife for a long time and she was sure that the Lord had orchestrated everything with buying our house and selling theirs. She was super excited about moving her six girls to Wylie from out of state. It was such a good conversation, I love that nice people are buying this house. They even love our style which was good because we don’t have to worry about covering our concrete floors, but also bad because they took all my kitchen furniture! The house hunt is coming to a close this week. We found a beautiful house that we did not expect to get with our offer, but somehow did! I guess I shouldn’t say the city on the internet, but I think most of you know. You know it’s one of those plain, ole cities. I crack myself up. Anyways we haven’t has it inspected or anything yet so it’s not officially ours yet.

Another exciting event was Kip and I’s 10th wedding anniversary! The last ten years have brought so many changes! We celebrated Young style with a trip to Macaroni grill and Barnes and Nobles. Then Kip bought a really nice bottle of wine (I think it cost more than our dinner) and we toasted and kissed a little ;). Good times with my honey! Oh and yes there is a big difference between expensive wine and the cheap stuff. I guess I’ll have to bare my soul on the changes in our marriage soon. I honestly never thought I would feel more happiness, more love, be more known and heard, by Kip than I am in this moment. Not that it was ever a bad marriage, there was just a faint whisper in my ear that it could be better. Thank you Jesus. Oh and I guess if you’ve read my blog you know this already, but it’s worth repeating. God wanted to change my heart and that changed my marriage, changed everything actually.

More excitement! Last weekend we attended our first membership class to join our church! I was actually pretty terrified going in… This will be the third time Kip and I have really thrown our lives into a church. I am going in with a different attitude though, I know I need guidance from the leaders now. Whereas the times before I have just thought of all the ways I would help shape the church. You know all my knowledge and expertise. I have nothing to offer this church really. I am willing to do pretty much whatever they ask though. I figure if they say it is going to make my life better then I will believe them. I have to trust someone, right? The meeting was amazing it confirmed that this is where God wants us. Three hours flew by and I continue to fall more and more in love with the church and best of all with Jesus. Also, I asked about more campuses and they said it was a possibility. I’m thrilled and praying for a campus in my plain ole city!

Last but not least… Today is my baby’s first birthday! I can’t believe he is turning one! I have to say that his little arrival rocked this mamma’s world. I think I complained about it to everyone for at least the first 8 months. I’m a little better now, but some days, well anyways… Two words to describe Maddox would be curious and happy. I say curious because, if there is a table in the room, he’s under it, a cabinet he’s pulling everything out, a place he’s not supposed to be, he is there! And then, everywhere we go he smiles at people. He actually stares people down until they smile back. Awh, Maddox we can’t imagine what it was ever like without you! We had a small party with just family to celebrate, take a look…

Trip to the River

We just got back from a trip to the Illinois River with some of our best friends. We had a blast riding the river, cooking, roasting marshmallows, and just hanging out! Take a peek at my pics :)!

Myla getting ready to go rafting...

Getting ready to go swimming

Myla and London so sweet!

Girls paddling back from a rafting trip, we make it look easy :)

Guys coming back!

Rafting buddies

Here are all the kids on a very stinky couch!